Information about GIDS and our team members
Discover more
Information and guidance for young people
Advice and guidance for professionals
Find out what is happening at GIDS and catch up with media coverage
My name is Matt and I am a 15-year-old trans male. I use him/he pronouns and I identify as male. I live with my mum (Fiona), dad (James) and 18-year-old sister (Becky). I have a 27-year-old sister (Charlotte) and a 3-year-old niece (Mia). I am just about to start my final year at secondary school (SCARY!). I love fantasy films such as Lord Of The Rings and Harry Potter, I also read many famous titles e.g. Skulduggery Pleasant and The Hobbit. I am a Gamer, I play on Xbox and play many games from COD to the Batman Arkham series. Cycling is one of the few sports I like doing as well as swimming and rugby. I am also a social media user, for example, I use YouTube to share my story about being trans. I also vlog about my daily life.
When I started puberty at 13, I felt that there was something wrong. I didn’t want to grow as a girl and certainly wasn’t enjoying it. One night my mum was helping to shave the areas that girls shave and I said to her “I don’t want this anymore, why is this happening to me?” At first, I came out as a lesbian but inside I didn’t know what I wanted or who I was. My mum decided that we should talk to the GP to find an answer. My GP was super helpful, she referred me to the CAMHS counselling facility where my counsellor Amy did some research and found the Gender Identity Development Service (GIDS) at the Tavistock and Portman. She explained to me and my mum that I might be transgender; that mentally I’m male but physically I’m female and that I want to change from female to male. As she described the definitions I was thinking in my head, yes this is how I feel, this must be what I am. Amy referred me to GIDS and I was buzzing with excitement waiting for my first appointment.
I was hoping that this service would provide the support I needed to understand what was going on. I was hoping for them to be understanding and supportive. I was hoping for them to be kind and cool.
My first appointment at GIDS was awesome. Before the appointment, I felt both nervous and excited. Both my mum and I were excited to meet Claudia, my psychologist. During the appointment, Claudia asked how I felt about my gender and when these feelings first started. They also explained to us what transgender meant and that there are a lot of different definitions of gender. They also asked my mum some questions about myself and stuff she had noticed about me. I also had to talk about my school and home life. They asked me what I wanted from the service and they told me about name changing and other medical stuff in the future. I felt nervous and had to look to my mum for most of it but afterwards it felt as if a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I finally talked to someone who understood what I was going though.
Since my first appointment, I have come out socially as transgender, changed my name from Maisie to Matt, both at home and at school, and I am about to start hormone blockers.
I find the young transgender people meeting quite helpful because you get to make new friends, talk to someone about both of your experiences and help others. I also find seeing Claudia and Jos helpful because it allows me to talk about my feelings and trans life openly whilst getting helpful support and feedback.
I would tell my younger self that, yes our life as trans is a little difficult but at times it is exciting and is very worthwhile.
My hopes for the future are to start Testosterone, have top surgery, meet someone whether their female or male and to have a great life as who I am.